From Helper to Helped

Neither Becky nor I have ever been people who are easily able to accept help. It has always been easier for me to lead a group and clean someone else's yard or offer to mow a friend's lawn, now, we are the ones who have had a gift card for supper dropped on our doorstep, the Northwest Christian Volleyball Team organize our garage and clean up our yard, or friends show up and start mowing our ridiculously overgrown lawn. Even though these are things we would have eventually done, the weight of not having these menial tasks hanging over us is profound. For this, we are so very thankful and do not know how to say thank you enough.

As we get back into the daily schedule of school and work, life has become increasingly busier and more difficult. We find ourselves in a weekly/biweekly pattern of Kate being nearly paralyzed with fear and anxiety while Becky and I don't even know how to respond to the other's smiles. Beyond anything, what this shows us is how far we are from really being "okay" and still need help. One of the greatest things about the people who have helped us thus far is that we didn't really know what we needed, they just did it. When people are helping or offering to help, I am realizing that I need to just let them help however they want, instead of trying to figure out how they can help.

The one way I do know how people can help is to simply give us a hug and ask us how we are doing. Like my previous post, this road we are on is incredibly lonely. Sometimes we have sat across from people we have known for years, just hoping they will ask how we are or how Kate is holding up. Even sending us a text letting us know you are praying for us or a funny gif or meme can do so much to help us not feel alone. So please, ask us how we are doing, give us a hug or shoot us a text, we don't know how to ask but we really need our family right now.